


There's Something

by braedens



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Demiromantic, Demiromantic Stiles Stilinski, Demisexual Stiles Stilinski, Demisexuality, Ficlet, Fluff, M/M, Mentions of Lydia Martin - Freeform, Misunderstandings, Questioning, bc i'm sappy af, happy endings, like if you squint really hard, mentions of Malia Tate, slight angst, stiles questioning his sexuality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-10
Updated: 2015-01-10
Packaged: 2018-03-06 22:19:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3150365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/braedens/pseuds/braedens
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>an anon on tumblr prompted: Sterek, Stiles had never felt sexual attraction until Derek</p>
            </blockquote>





	There's Something

Not even with Lydia.

He should have known, throughout high school, really, that even with his increase admiration for Lydia Martin, it was purely sentimental. He wanted to caress her strawberry blonde locks before he’d think about her in bed. Honestly, what teenage boy _doesn't_ have an increased sex drive? But with clouded judgment and ignorance, Stiles just thought that this feeling for her, whatever it was, was normal.  

And that should have been his dawning moment, to realize that something was off. But he was young, and really ignorant, and all he knew was that women were what he was supposed to be interested in. 

But then there was Derek. Brooding, muscular, dark hair and emerald eyes, and Stiles didn’t have the tendency to want to rip the man’s shirt off and put his mouth all over his abs than he wanted to wrap him up in a hug. Which was weird, almost everyone with eyes in Beacon Hills wanted to have a piece of Hale. And yet, Stiles just had a nagging feeling of wanting to be his friend. 

That should have been when he knew.

 

But it took time, and Stiles was way to scared to start looking into that stuff. _Supress, supress, supress_.

Stiles got over Lydia. He realized that Lydia made a much better friend than a girlfriend.

He dated Malia under confusing circumstances, and broke that off after a few weeks. It didn't feel right, he didn't feel a spark. Stiles just assumes it's just the problem of finding his type.

_They're not the **one**._

_It just didn't click._

_Someone is out there._

Which is what blindly led him to believe that maybe he was just looking in the wrong gender. 

It was easier after high school. Stiles felt more open with his sexuality (and Scott basically almost killed him in hugs when he finally confessed it to him), so college as the opportunity to expand his horizons. So thought this was it, right? He was going to find that spark. 

Wrong. 

Well, he was also right. He _did_ find guys attractive. He started the cycle; dates, the casual making-out, and even sex once in a while. But he always just felt so... disgusting afterwards.  And ironically, more alone than before. So, he kind of gave up.  Maybe dating just wasn't his thing? He still had friends, and he still was close to the pack, but he decided that for the rest of college, he would just steer clear of trying to be in a relationship.

And one night, feeling particularly bold (and a little tipsy), Stiles found himself typing into Google:

_'when you're not attracted to people"_

Asexual.

Maybe that was it? It made sense to him. He doesn't remember ever feeling strongly attracted to anyone aside from aggressive wanted to talk to them.

So, that was it, then?

 

And then he came back to Beacon Hills post-grad. And Derek was alive, and well, and  _there_ , and Stiles didn’t know why the second he let himself into Derek's loft when he came home after graduation he felt like something in him was stitched back together, something he didn’t even know was even torn.

The thing is, Stiles has known Derek for years. He knows that Derek has an extra copy of Withering Heights on his bookshelf because the original copy was his mom's, and while he loves reading the book, he doesn't want to wear out her copy.

He knows that Derek is a heathen that doesn't put sugar in his coffee. Like, ever.

And he knows that if Derek is willing to let you be in the same place as him for longer than a half-hour, let alone in his home, he has to really trust you.

 

Derek let him stay in the loft for the summer, so that he wouldn’t have to be dependent on his father and could find a job until he had to start grad school. They lived around each other, in sync with their routines, and Stiles learned more about Derek that he thought was possible, like how he wakes up incredibly early to go for a run, just so he can watch the sun rise, or how he calls Cora twice a week, on Saturdays and Wednesdays, at the same time, just to casually talk to her, or how he knows just how many blankets Stiles needs in order to fall asleep. 

They do stupid things like watch one-star rated movies on Netflix just to make fun of them, or sit in a diner sharing a plate of fries at 3AM when Stiles can't sleep and talk about the bad things eating them up inside. Or they make sponstanious trips to the coast with the pack, enjoying the sun and the beach, and Stiles always makes sure his towel is lain right next to Derek's.There's light touches and soft smiles, and it's nice. Stiles feels happy.

Derek had slowly become his best friend.

But then Stiles starts graduate school, and he meets a guy, Charles. He’s studying environmental law, and he’s great, really. Him and Stiles get close; he invites him over to the loft a lot, and Stiles starts to notice how less often Derek is there.

Sure, he’s not _entitled_ to be home, but it’s not like Derek has a job or anything to keep him out all day. It goes on for about a year. So, of course, being the paranoid bastard that he is, Stiles decides to confront him one night when he actually hears Derek open and close the loft doors at a reasonable hour. 

"Alright, what the hell?" He storms down the stairs, catching Derek like a deer in headlights when the older man stops in his tracks. 

"Stil-"

"No, don’t play dumb, dipshit," he snaps, making a bee-line for Derek. "You’ve been avoiding me like a fucking plague since I started grad."

Derek looks exhausted when rubs his hand over his face, and makes a grimace. 

"Yeah, well, maybe I don’t want to interfere with your… interests." Derek mumbles.

"Excuse me, what was that?" he asks with a bit of snark, following Derek into the kitchen where he’s getting something from the fridge. 

"Charles." he says through clenched teeth. Stiles can see the muscles tense in his back.

There’s an unbearable silence, and Stiles eyes widen in realization. 

"What, wait, me and Charles? Why are you getting mad about him, he’s grea-"

"Because I’m in love with you, Stiles!" Derek yells, slamming the fridge door shut. "It’s hard enough to have you come back and be around you these past few months knowing you don't feel the same,  but I don’t need to see the guy you’re dating all the time to remind me that, that.."

He trails off, realizing just how much he’s giving away, and Stiles just stares with his mouth apart and  _did Derek just say he was in love with me?_

And then Derek looks like he’s retreating, like this is the moment he’s going to walk back out the door and never come back again, and before he can even take the step backwards, Stiles moves to hold onto his wrist and presses a firm, hard kiss to Derek’s mouth. 

It’s unreciprocated at first, Stiles moving his lips in tune with Derek’s, and when he licks at Derek’s bottom lip, he finally feels firm hands slip around his waist and pull him closer, angling his head so that Derek can kiss him harder. 

It takes a few seconds before Derek realizes what he’s doing and pulls apart, and Stiles doesn’t think he’s ever seen anything more beautiful than Derek’s glazed eyes and red, puffy lips. Why has he never thought about this, about wanting to kiss him?

"What about Charles?" Derek says in a low voice, like he might be reprimanded for asking. 

And Stiles cannot believe how idiotic Derek can be. He moves to rub his hands over Derek’s shoulders and arms. 

"Charles is funny, and cool, and is just as big of a nerd as I am. He’s great." Stiles trails, with a small smile on his face. "And so is his girlfriend." 

Stiles likes to take that moment to watch Derek’s expression as he realizes the situation. 

"So, you’re, you guys aren’t.."

"No, dumbass. He’s a great friend, and I’ve been helping him decide how he’s going to propose to his girlfriend." Stiles snakes his hands around Derek’s neck, his fingers carded through the small hairs at the nape. "Besides, my relationship days have been limited when I realized the only person I was attracted to was you."

And Derek beams, like he was just given the sun and the moon and all of the stars right then and there. His arms tighten around the brunet’s waist, brushing their noses together. 

"If you've always liked me, why didn't you say anything?"

Stiles' cheek grow hot and he looks down at his feet. "Maybe because I didn't always? I don't know, I've never actually felt, like, an attraction to anyone before until now, I guess?" he stutters, feeling shaky. "I think I'm asexual?"

"But, you like me? In all ways?" Derek asks skeptically.

Stiles looks up, tightening his hold around Derek's neck. "Yeah, I do." he smiles. He moves his head to go back in to kiss him but-

"Demisexual."

Stiles blinks and pulls back. "Huh?"

"Demisexual. Or Demiromantic. It's when you don't feel sexually or romantically attracted to someone unless you form an emotional bond."

Stiles blinks again, unaware of how his mouth is agape. "That's a real thing? Like, people actually identify as that?"

He watches Derek's mouth curl into a grin when he nods. "Yes, it's real."

And not that he thinks about it, all the times he tried casual dating or hooking up, he just thought he was rushing things, going to fast all the time. That something was wrong with him.

Demisexual. 

"Do you think that's what it is?" Derek's asks, his hands rubbing up and down Stiles' back. 

And Stiles thinks about Malia, whom he started dating a week after he met her, or how when he started becoming Lydia's friend, all he wanted was just that; a friend. And how blind dates and hooking up at parties always scared him. 

And then he thinks about Derek. Who was his friend from the beginning, who, even though he was _in fucking love_ with Stiles, and assumed Stiles didn't reciprocate, still wanted to have him around and be his friend. Who held him when he cried and made him flashcards for his thesis presentations and took his dad to the goddamn doctor when Stiles couldn't get out of his teacher's assistant job. And Stiles thinks that even though he knows he didn't like him then, he likes Derek more than ever now.

Stiles can't help but grin into the chaste kiss he pulls Derek in for.

"Yeah, I do. I really do." he whispers. "Do you... do you still..like me?" he asks tentatively.  

He watches Derek roll his eyes. "Would I still be here if I didn't?"

"Would you?"

Derek's expression softens, and Stiles feels himself be pulled impossible closer to Derek, flush against him. Their foreheads touch, and Stiles closes his eyes because it's all too overwhelming of how good he feels, better than he's ever felt with anyone.

"I'm always going to be here." 

Stiles laughs lightly, catches emerald eyes with his. "Just fucking kiss me again."

"That, I can happily do."

———

Later that night, after they found themselves tumbling to Derek’s room and snagging pieces of clothes off each other before they even make it to a bed, Stiles tries to remember the last time he’d ever felt this way. Felt like this is something that he wanted, that he won't feel guilty or pressured. He can't remember the last time he felt like he was _with_ someone he trusted, or cared deeply for, or even loved. He can't remember feeling loved, and wanted, and like the world was stopping it's orbit just to focus on him.  But right now, that’s all he can think about when Derek is peppering kissing over his stomach and sucking marks on his inner thighs. 

He’d never wanted something,  _this_ , so badly. 

Afterwards, Derek pulls his laptop to the bed and wraps an arm around Stiles, pulling up articles and posts about sexuality and demisexuality, reading blogs about people that are demiromantic and reading them out loud, and Stiles feels like he's bursting with so many emotions at once that he could cry. It wasn't just that he "hadn't had a spark" or he's just with the "wrong" people. He needed to feel secure with someone, know that they were going to be worth it and understand that Stiles needed time. And Derek did.

Stiles falls asleep with his head on Derek's shoulder, only to be rustled awake when Derek moves them down the bed to pull him under the covers gingerly pulling Stiles so Derek can wrap him in his arms. Stiles is just overcome with the feeling of wanting this to be forever, to want to go to sleep with his arms around Derek and their feet tangled in the sheets, and to want to wake him up in the morning with a blowjob just because he can, and because it's _Derek_.

Just as sleep starts dragging through him, he feels lips move across the top of his head, pressing on for a few seconds before he can just feel the small, warm breath of Derek's sleeping. And when he moves to lace his fingers with Derek, he realized that he was never _just_ waiting for someone to come along.

He was waiting for Derek. 

And Derek waited for him.

**Author's Note:**

> *this fic was edited*  
> I've got a lot of people wondering if Stiles was asexual or demisexual, and I just kind of depicted this after my own sexual orientation and how I came to realize it. I'm demisexual, and I feel like it was really easy for my to confuse myself to be asexual, especially since i didn't know demisexuality was a thing for a long time. Sexuality is very fluid in almost every sense, so there's no right was to be demi or ace. 
> 
> I'd love to hear ya'lls opinions on this, so comment, let's talk about it. 
> 
> Derek's POV hopefully coming soon!
> 
> I'm braedens on tumblr.


End file.
